Not to steal Mustache Wednesday‘s considerable thunder, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t kick off the day with a eulogy for the finest milk-strainer of summer camp — ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Colt McCoy:

Our boyish freshman is officially grown up.

McCoy told local news in Austin the ‘stache will be gone as of Tuesday night, thus also ending his token overture to "team unity" with the offensive line. The big uglies can take their sugar dusters to epic proportions, but Heisman voters — like the American people at large since Taft — view whiskers only with suspicion.

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Hat tip: Big League Screw.