1–2 minutes

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Whether you’re Michael Paulson who lives at 3425 Longview Terrace and makes $86,400 a year, or Jessica Goldblatt from Lynnwood, WA, who already has well-established trust issues, we at Google would just like to say how very, truly sorry we are.

Google CEO Eric Schmidt* responds to outcries over handling of private user data

From The Onion: ‘Google Responds To Privacy Concerns With Unsettlingly Specific Apology’

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* – not really, it’s The Onion.

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